Our last week of the spending freeze was predictably the most interesting. Our fridge is more empty every day and it is bringing me joy somehow. It’s simpler, it’s quite obvious what we’re able to make or not make, and ingredients still keep coming together for amazing meals. Less choice is easier and relaxing when other things seems so fast paced.

January 25: Tory really brought it home this week with a feast with our final stash of eggs and other goodies for brunch - the theme of ABUNDANCE is still very relevant!


January 26: We budgeted our trips for the rest of the month so we could decide what outings we could combine and feasibly still get to work. Once Tory's meeting was bumped into February we didn't have to cancel anything, and we went from home to Solomon’s Porch, to Bloomington and back on Sunday. We did tap into our spare 4 gallons reserved for the lawnmower in the summer!


January 28: So on Tuesday, on the way home from work in my car, not surprisingly, this happened:


January 29: And on Wednesday morning, this happened:


My commutes for the rest of the week were very snowy, but all the other bus riders were in high spirits from the fluffy snow.
Elliot has been kind enough to pick us up for climbing at VE most Wednesdays if we’re up for it and Tory went this week while I continued to sew.

January 30: In the evening, Tory and I met at the Beta.MN event Reed was putting on - I took the bus and Tory negotiated with a lovely mom and pop restaurant for free parking downtown.  Beta.MN provided enough delicious hors d'oeuvres to call dinner, and topped it off with free pizza at the end of the night. Yum.

January 31: Last day! People really treated us on this last day, whether they knew it or not. My work ordered Glamdoll donuts, Tory's carpool buddy brought him breakfast, someone else took him out for lunch, and Micah and Jo cooked us a final feast for dinner and took us sledding. Thanks all!


We have been putting thought into what this all means and what it has taught us - today we talked about instead of deciding what to continue to exclude from our lives, talking about what we will put back in. Very conclusively though, WE MADE IT! And it wasn't even as hard as I thought it would be. Four of our friends decided without our knowledge until recently to try their own spending freeze for February! So that will be helpful in continuing to give us perspective and I'm excited to spend some time reflecting on all of this.

January 15 - Halfway there! I made Indian coconut curry and we stayed in watched a movie and ate popcorn. I made sure we stocked up so much we wouldn't run out of popcorn! In other news, the Black Hearts Ball site launched today and I'm very excited! Get tickets if you want to come see what I've been working on for this Valentine's day :)

January 16 - Work night - Tory paints and I sew.

January 17 - Adam and McCall willingly drove to our place for chili dinner and we played a few intense rounds of Dutch Blitz.

January 18 - Tory breaks into the old dried goods: soaking beans overnight and using dried rice noodles to get creative with a new Thai dish. I had a sleepover with Melissa at Jo's house next door... just tromped a few feet through the snow drifts to get home!

January 19 - Anneke stopped by for tea and good talks. Tory's car is still at half a tank since he switched up his carpool, so we took that one to Solomon's Porch in south Minneapolis and then continued on to Bloomington for dinner and games with Tory's family.

January 20 - My car continues to have battery issues and won't start. My first time taking the bus again in at least a year is quite successful and I get to work in about 35 minutes instead of the typical 20 in the snow by car, which isn't bad at all. I was excited and ready to give up the car entirely until the my route home proved much less invigorating as it was dark already which made it cold, and the transfer was longer downtown.


January 21 - 24 - I took the bus successfully a few other sub zero days this week, interspersed with driving Tory to carpool and taking our jetta, which has a broken connection in the exhaust and is becoming painful to drive. We are realizing that cars are a pretty massive expense over time. I also had a work meeting downtown this week and had to park far away and walk because I realized I couldn't pay the 50 cents for the meter. It's all a good reminder of how my former, frugal-by-necessity self made it work and that public transit is both a good resource and also the norm for a lot of people.

We made sure this month to budget enough gas to go to Saint Paul for our Free book club meeting. Tory had a crazy day at work and didn't get a chance to stop and eat lunch (this is not the way we prefer to save meals!). I took the bus in the morning and worked late until a very hungry Tory picked me up. I got a call from him around 6:30 saying he was crossing the bridge on 35W into NE minneapolis... which is how to get to my work's old building. Tory's internal autopilot had failed to recognize that my work is now located on eat street so he looped back and we headed onward to Saint Paul. Neither of us quite remembered where our friends lived but had a general idea and figured we would remember when we got close. Needless to say, we got lost on the side streets, roaming around. We were wasting gas (our most precious resource at this point) and feeling the exhaust fumes so Tory pulled over and turned the car off and I finally found a phone number and got directions. Armed with that, and ready to be warm and at our destination, we went to start the car with no success. Tory flagged down a kind stranger pretty quickly and he brought is car around to give us a jump.


All these things together added up to kind of a rough night but after we got a jump we were welcomed into our friend's home with open arms, a lovely dinner and unending supply of popcorn. It made for good discussion, since our book club is all about finances, time, and relationships.

It was the first time our experiment was truly challenging since our typical fixes weren't there for us to fall back on:
- getting the exhaust repaired
- stopping to buy something to eat on the go
- idling the car / not worrying about conserving gas
So we had to deal with them and ask for the help of friends and strangers. A good practice in relying on the goodness of others and provisions of God to get through even small challenges.

Nearing the end of the third week of the experiment, we budgeted out our meals for the rest of the month just to make sure we were rationing properly and would have enough resources to make 24 more meals (not including breakfast). Looking good!

Okay, beginning week two. Food is still abundant. Cars are at just over half tank of gas respectively.

January 13 - So far this month has been a good exercise in letting go of control and self-reliance and being willing to ask friends and family for help, for fun, for carpools and more. Monday night, we didn't even ask - Melissa offered to get us all free tickets to see Her at the the Lagoon theater through her work, which we had really wanted to see but resigned ourselves to waiting at least until it came to the Hopkins theater. We parked for free a quarter mile away and took a short walk to the theater in the big fluffy snow flakes. We are still mulling over the movie - in a good way - highly recommended! After the movie, we met up with Elliot and Ryan at the climbing gym and and then stopped by Ryan's house to pick up some shower and tile caulk - our only tube of it split open right after Tory started finishing up the shower resealing project. We can shower again!

January 14 - This morning I brought Tory to a conference downtown on my way to work - it's a rare day that we get to carpool together.
My boss decided to cater lunch to the office just because. We've been living in luxury this month!

I've eaten most of my salty snacks at work and have had to move on to the purely healthy stuff - apples and peanut butter and almonds.

I have a habit of regularly checking our bank, and it's been very strange to have no changes to speak of.

One of the best things about this month has been that its long enough to break habits (ones like stopping at the thrift store on the way home from work, going out for coffee or tea, and our frequent restaurant bills)

And it's long enough to starting new habits - keeping homemade food on hand for lunches, making healthy muffins so I can grab one to go in the mornings, finding creative solutions since buying a fix isn't an option, finding free activities and hosting people at our place, and grouping our excursions together to save on gas. The funny thing is that it doesn't feel very different from normal life. We're just not spending any money.

An interesting thing about this experiment is that it's going to get harder as it progresses! After week one we are in high spirits and feel like it has mostly added positive changes to our lives. For example, when faced with the choice of preparing healthy homemade meals for lunch all week vs. preparing and therefore eating nothing, the obvious choice so far has been to prioritize making lunches! Here are a few other little life adjustments we've made each day.

January 1 - We went to Adam and McCall's for New Years and they brought us to a party at friends of theirs which ended up being lots of fun. We brought eggs and other breakfast goodies to Adam and McCall's earlier that night, knowing we would sleep over and want to go to brunch in the morning - the first day of the Spending Freeze. McCall and Tory made an awesome egg bake and we had such a relaxing morning drinking tea and coffee while it was in the oven.



January 2 - The deLange family Christmas present opening Skype was moved to January 2 this year to get everyone in on the call at the same time over the holidays. So we were given a ton of wonderful, thoughtful, and practical gifts to add to our lives. It was an easy day to practice gratefulness, and we are also grateful to be able to video chat with everyone and thank them "in person".



January 3 - Tory's coworker bought him a beer, and a new friend of mine was willing to go to the Tea Garden where I have a groupon for a large drink that I had already bought last month. In a disappointing turn of events, Tory had to drive all the way to Delano when his carpool buddies had other plans. Hans Wagen=3/4 tank by day 3. Tory arranged alternative carpool with Jonah for back up.

January 4 - Spent all day inside, which felt appropriate according to the temperature. Meal planning has been interesting since it's important to use up the things that will spoil and save the things that won't for later. In the morning, Tory made a huevos rancheros style egg bake with lots of veggies and black beans for protein, and I ended up making a pumpkin, cauliflower, spinach, and mock duck green curry and oatmeal pumpkin muffins later that evening. That pumpkin needed to be eaten.

January 5 - We lined up our activities in south Minneapolis for the day to maximize gas and travel. I brought my trusty consultant Tory to my designer meeting at You&Me, then we went to the VE Climbing Gym --- Solomon's Porch --- Home again. I'm pretty sore today since we ended up spending almost three hours at the gym before church but it was fun and felt like a good use of time with some buddies who showed up as well. We were quite hungry and a bit sad that we couldn't go out for dinner with the buddies after climbing or to Chipotle with the group after church but we rushed home and ate yummy leftover egg veggie bean bake wrapped up in tortillas. Been thinking a lot about instant vs. delayed gratification.




January 6 - We looked at the calendar and realized that January is a disproportionately long month and that there is still essentially 4 work weeks left of the experiment and we've already used a quarter of both our gas tanks! With Tory's commute, gas is definitely the most valuable resource in this experiment. I reaaaally hope it gets warmer before my bus commute begins. Neither of our cars started after work! After dinner we hung out with the next door neighbors, blew freezing bubbles and threw boiling water into the air - a night well spent.

January 7 - I gave a guy who was walking all bundled up a ride to the store this morning which has little to do with frugality, but still a lot to do with cultivating a spirit of abundance instead of scarcity. It barely made a different in my commute but saved him from walking almost 10 minutes in polar temperatures. And it was a small exercise in cultivating intentional vulnerability instead of fear which is a rare opportunity these days.

In the evening we had our bi-weekly finances group / couples group therapy / all around fantastic time. An ongoing conversation in that group has been around abundance and we got to share our experiment so far. The main reason for this experiment is saying, WE HAVE ENOUGH. Tory described it as living off the fat. We have so much that for a month we can live of the excess we've been accruing and be totally fine. A little more creative and intentional, and better for it hopefully.

A few months ago, I was asked to address fashion and faith and show my Voltage collection at a church in Toronto next spring, so I spent some time reflecting on preliminary questions around spirituality and fashion design - topics not usually paired together. When internal disagreements rose up in the church around some of these very questions, the fashion show and Q&A portions were understandably cancelled. I learned a lot through defining my thoughts and appreciate the opportunity to address these questions, so I decided to name it and post it.


This is a manifesto on my Why’s of Fashion Design and its Paradoxes. These are observations I have named as truth here today in 2013. It is subject to change as all my views are, as I learn, dialogue and grow. I’m sure I am not the first to say most of these things. But I asked myself what I believe and came up with this.


When you design clothing, how does your faith enter into the process?


Designing clothing is one of the things that I get lost in and I am able to be alone with myself and just exist and create. In that sense it is spiritual for me because I feel very alive and authentic. I think mimicking our Creator by using our minds and talents to create is a very spiritual act, and it is very peaceful for me. It reminds me that I am a creation myself and that I was built to create with the gifts I find I was given.



Why should people care about what they wear?


Fashion is a way we communicate, and since everyone communicates something through their fashion choices, consciously or not, I think it is worth caring and being intentional about.


For me fashion is a big part of how I share my uniqueness. I get to do a small exercise in the creative part of my brain every morning. Some of my clothes I’ve made myself but most are thrifted. I love patterns and sometimes it will occur to me to put two patterns I’ve never worn together beside each other and the way they play off each other creates a new visual impact. I also like that I can choose to avoid the exercise and go with something basic that I know I will feel comfortable and confident in all day.

When I was a teenager, I defined myself on being different which made the whole high school experience easier and I was able to be more myself since I wasn’t always guarded, worried that people would realize that I was weird. I just was, and the way I dressed, everyone already knew that. I also found friends that expressed their differences and confidence through their fashion and accessories and felt like I belonged somewhere.
 



Most models are beautiful, and they are usually tiny. Do you design for everyone, or just beautiful people? Why or why not? What about obese people? Older people?


I love designing custom clothing made to fit just one person perfectly. Because I’m a one person design company, on the one hand, I design runway collections as a chance to share my vision for fashion, and then I build up custom work as people see my aesthetic and want something custom created. I really enjoy working with all shapes and ages for custom work and getting to create something beautiful in collaboration with customers. I really love creating unique wedding gowns for that reason as well.

For a runway show that unveils a fashion collection as part of an untouchable artistic expression, healthy but slim and tall women are appropriate because when models are approximately the same proportions, they become a blank canvas to communicate a vision. In no way do I think a woman who is a size 4 or even smaller is more beautiful than a larger woman. This specific kind of runway show is not about defining or defying our societal standards of beauty or about showing the unique beauty of each model. It's about uniformity for the sake of presentation of the garments themselves.


It depends on the goal of the show. If I am creating a collection for a show that is about community or a specific benefit, then I wouldn’t want models that all looked similar, I would want models that will communicate that vision of strength and individuality. I would want a variety of unique people who are part of the community to model, and let their personality shine through, by smiling and enjoying their part in the presentation.


In fashion shoots and editorials, when I am trying to create a specific aura and tell a visual story, I am inspired by models with unique features, women who are powerful and unique in their own way. They bring their own stories and personality and it is great to be able to use that individual beauty to communicate visually.

I absolutely think that having a diverse representation of women in fashion and beauty industries is important and lacking. It’s really valuable for young people to see reflections of themselves included in our society’s definition of beauty, which I think is slowly expanding (very slowly, I’ll admit). It is even more important though, for young people to see reflections of themselves in positions of intelligence, creativity and strength rather than beauty.



As a designer, what sort of advice would you give to people who can't afford your clothes, or very much of your clothes?


I can’t afford my clothing prices either! I find it so strange that some people are willing to pay so much for clothing, either in a mall or from a designer. Buying from a designer is definitely better since you know who and what you are supporting. But because I create each design myself and I put 6 hours minimum into a dress, to even make $10/hour not counting material costs, that dress is already out of my price range.


On the other hand though, what would the world be without art? Artists face the same kind of dichotomy - we all just want to create art, but in order to make it sustainable, there needs to be somewhere to put it, to display it, someone to value it and be willing to pay for it’s creation. So for me personally though I am not willing to pay much for clothing or art, I am really glad that some people are willing to and that they keep artists going. I feel this especially when I look back at history, since fashion and art can tell us so much about the direction and expressions of the time period.


My advice if you can’t afford it, is to buy it directly from a small designer and try to find young and new artists who are still building themselves up. Hopefully you will get a great deal on a completely unique piece and help them build up their experience. I also recommend trying to barter if you have a useful skill to offer in exchange for something custom!


Also, my tendency is always to buy second hand instead of new anyways. My recommendation would be to get creative even if you don’t normally see yourself that way. I think it’s a really valuable skill to know how to make slight alterations and use a sewing machine and it opens up your ability to buy second hand and tweak something really great but oversized to fit just right for you or add something unique to an otherwise plain design.



Some people might say that spending money on clothes is poor stewardship. What would you say?


Spending money on clothes is poor stewardship to a large extent. It is not good for the environment, it supports unsustainable systems, and it can be expensive and therefore tough on personal finances. And yet we all need clothes to wear. And we live in places where we have the luxury of being able to spend time considering what we will wear and how we will use it to express ourselves.


The best solution I have found that answers all of my concerns around stewardship is buying second hand, wearing great garments cast off by a system of excess.


I also am unsustainably clumsy and rough on my clothes. So for me it makes sense to buy low and more often since even if I bought something brand new that is intended to last long, I will inevitably spill something down the front.


What do you want people to think when they see your clothing?


When people see my designs, I want them to appreciate that they are seeing something unique. I mix and match patterns and colors until I find combinations that strike my eye as pleasing and I hope that other people have that experience too - surprising but striking combinations.


I want a woman to buy one of my garments because it caught her eye and it reflects a part of herself, because she will cherish it, and because she feels empowered and confident in her uniqueness when she wears it. I want my clothes to accent and highlight each person’s individuality.


What makes for beautiful clothing, here and now? I mean, people in Thailand or India or Senegal obviously have different, culturally conditioned, ideas about what makes for beautiful clothing. So what are your values for clothing?


I think there is a fine line between beauty being in the eye of the beholder vs. a universal aesthetic. There are some universal standards like color theory, that define what colors will be beautiful together. But there could be a use in which conflicting colors used in a new way create something not quite beautiful, but interesting and therefore valuable.


Mainly it's important to dress for your own body and uniqueness as opposed to following trends that might feel tacked on or unflattering even if they are considered beautiful because they are trendy.


Is great fashion for everyone, always?


I don’t think so, no!  There are so many situations where there is just no need for great fashion and it can be very freeing to think very little about it.  Just like great conscious fashion choices can highlight and be used to express what a person is about, it can detract from who they are as well. Janelle Monae wears a suit when she performs so the focus is on her music. The music should be the focus and she has chosen to highlight her music by muting her fashion choices. I think it is important to think about what we wear but sometimes that will lead us to choosing something very practical and mundane instead of great.

 
Do clothes make the man (woman)? Why or why not?


I am going to refer to this quote by Linda Grant, author of The Thoughtful Dresser, “Clothes are not everything, but you cannot have depths without surfaces. They communicate with what is within; between the two there is always a great dialogue.”


What about materials? What matters?


Materials are key - and also quite difficult to source sustainably. It is so important to be responsible and be conscious about not contributing to pollution, environmental degradation, dangerous work environments, abusive systems, and consumer excess. Because I have a small label made by hand, I can often use remnants and recycled fabrics and create with the excess. But it can be really challenging regardless to balance responsible fabric sourcing with attempting to keep costs and therefore final prices down. I’m on the board of a non-profit called Sol Inspirations that advocates for responsible fashion, and we try to connect designers who are outsourcing some of their work with local fabric and manufacturing sources, among other things. I think this is a baby step in the right direction. Being part of that organization challenges me to continue to find better practices and sources and be part of a growing movement towards responsible fashion, from environmental improvements, to challenging industry standards, to creating accountability and safety for people around the world.



What do you struggle with in your industry and in your business?


For me, fashion design is full of paradox.


Authenticity vs. Publicity: I want to be an authentic person in all situations but I sometimes feel pressure to attend networking events in order to keep up interest in my line and have the press promote it. Thankfully I’ve connected with a group of designers, artists, and friends in Minneapolis who are very genuine and focused on creating interesting art and fashion and hosting fun events that celebrate diversity of talent. I am showing a mini collection with that group as part of a developing event next year so that is one exciting answer to this paradox so far.


Creation vs. Consumption: I want to create - fashion design is my medium but in order to make it a sustainable endeavor I need to be able to sell what I make. That puts my work into a super oversaturated market, where I am adding to the consumer excess that already exists. And yet I feel like I must create, whether it is fashion or other mediums so I have created a small business around it, keep involved with Sol Inspirations, and try to keep myself on track using sustainable materials where possible and only creating a new collection once per year instead of per season. Focusing more on custom work where possible is a good way to solve some of the dilemma, but consumption sadly remains at the heart of it.


Expression vs. Superficiality: I want to use fashion to express myself, but there is a fine line between expressing myself and becoming too focused on appearances. It is important for me to not become wrapped up in vanity and external beauty in pursuit of self expression so this is a balance I am always working out.


Inclusion vs. Presentation: I discussed this at length above - I want to share my art with the world and have the focus be on the art, but the medium uses individual people as canvasses. Using people who differ from typical industry standards as part of the presentation implicitly draws the attention from the clothes and instead makes a statement about the wearer. Editorial shoots are probably the most fun and creative ways to work around this, where the goal is to create an overall feeling and story,  as opposed to presenting garments one after another on a runway. Stories are for everyone and I want to incorporate much more diversity in my work.


I think there will always been these paradoxes, but I’m interested to see how they will play out and hopefully lead me to new collaboration opportunities and challenges in the future.


Are there scriptural passages (or other spiritual writings) that inspire you?


Rilke’s book, Letters to a Young Poet inspire me in my work for sure. He writes about the importance of finding what you must do at your core and then organizing your life around it. He is talking about writing, but the same can be said of any activity or passion. I know I must attempt to create and share artistic pursuits made with my own hands… fashion design has been the most successful path of tactile and visual expression for me so far.


I am generally more deeply influenced by the evidence of God - through travel, spending time in the ocean, interactions with humans from many walks of life, and all the world’s beauty and magnitude - than I am by written word.

If I switch to KDWD in the morning on the way to work (because I want to hear Beyonce, obviously) I am always surprised again by the weirdness of the dj's and how they perpetuate stereotypes, particularly about how typical Americans should live, pro-consumerism, how they are hyper critical and interested in the lives of famous people, and they are particularly generic with their banter with each other (the girl puts up with a lot but then calls the guys out for being too critical or crude and is laughed off as uptight, etc). It's a pattern that they've found works for radio (but not for me).

So I was listening to this morning's weekend arts round up on The Current instead and was suddenly surprised to have those same kind of feelings as they joked for quite a while about how stressful the holidays are and made that a reason to go check out some new comedy performances in town. More festivities to offer 'relief' from the stressful season. Seemingly normal banter, but it struck me really hard today, paired with ads popping up all over reminding me that I need to buy more, start that 'stressful' Christmas shopping, find that perfect thing, etc. The fact that it seemed commonplace and a normal feature of life was the most striking part:

How is it that we live in a place where we are so privileged that our holidays - our times of celebration and family and joy - have become burdens?

And why do we accept this as the norm?
So here's to a holiday season where we make many of our gifts, we only buy things that we've picked out with excitement to gift to a loved one, we buy many of those things used but still in good shape, and we don't fill our homes with any more things or decorations that add stress, need more upkeep or create additional clutter. Consider that hardships exists but that stress is mostly self created.



Things I will try to live by this season:
If it feels like a burden instead of a celebration, don't do it or don't go.
If I feel I must go, make peace with it first and bring that peace along with me.
If it feels out of place or superficial, say what's on my mind, with love (challenging, no doubt).
Reject the notion that the holidays will be stressful.
Enjoy the people, traditions and spiritual depth around me.
Opt out of traditions that aren't meaningful and create new ones that are.
Support the people who try to do it all by sharing the work, bringing simple dishes along, or taking on some of the needed tasks.
Be genuinely hospitable: Invite people into our home, our usual lives, our chaos.
Be consciously thankful for big and little blessings.
Appreciate little moments as a gift from my maker and be present.