That night I had a realization as I was falling asleep - we should treat everyone we meet as if they are an old friend. Accept and overlook or cherish personality quirks that we would otherwise not understand, and appreciate each person for who they are, what they have been through and the richness they contribute to our lives. This is no easy task but leaves room for so much joy. I think I will be working towards this for the rest of my life but it was nice to have a glimpse of it come so easy.
Another Christmas is come and gone and it's now 2014!
As usual, we’ve been spoiled, by others and by ourselves over the holidays and the last year. All this luxury combined with the sizable dent the furnace replacement put in our plan to save money, along with other influences like our book club FREE: Spending Your Time and Money on What Matters Most and a faithful following of the Mr. Money Mustache blog, made Tory end up sending me this email on December 30th.
His email sums up the premise. The quick decision gave us a day to hunt and gather, which was good because even with that day I feel ready for a minor apocalypse.
Here's what we did to to prepare:
Bought $275 worth of groceries, including lots of dry cat food and toilet paper. This is plenty of food but we’ll probably still have to get creative later on in the month and eat what we have instead of refilling up on the easy options, which is the goal here.
Filled up both cars with gas.
Ordered a $25 bus pass online - enough for me to get to and from work for two weeks plus a little extra just in case. Tory commutes 50 miles round trip to work so we expect that his week to drive the carpool will clean him out and then some.
Bought postage online for a package I knew I had to send in January.
Ordered a $25 bus pass online - enough for me to get to and from work for two weeks plus a little extra just in case. Tory commutes 50 miles round trip to work so we expect that his week to drive the carpool will clean him out and then some.
Bought postage online for a package I knew I had to send in January.
Tried to order winter tires for our road bike but it is too old and no one makes them anymore.
Cancelled our Amazon prime free trial.
Paid remaining credit card balances for the month.
Things we already had:
Even more food, including beans, cooking oil, rice, flour, and more.
Our nutritional supplements for several months worth.
Plenty of canned food for the cats - and they might kill us if we didn't.
Vertical Endeavors climbing gym memberships.
Vertical Endeavors climbing gym memberships.
General abundance of clothes, shelter, transportation, and luxuries.
Some early realizations of what this means:
1. Our choice to do a spending freeze could put more weight on our friends to make up for our inability to go out, if we can’t make frequent visits across town, and not being able to drive anywhere that requires paying for parking. Hopefully this issue can be worked around.
2. We might have to bike in the winter to work/carpool!
3. This will force us to plan ahead for lunches for the week since we've removed the easy back up options.
3. I have to postpone my ordering of 2013 Year in Review! Which I was working on tonight and just occurred to me! Bah!
4. These kinds of little spending desires are going to keep happening... they are not all bad but it's good to keep them in check.
5. We very much want this month to have a feeling of abundance around it, not scarcity. We have so much.
I plan to adjust but not eliminate things from our normal lives, and find a way to do the things we value, just without money. Kind of like a life puzzle. Keeps things interesting! Here goes day three...
3. This will force us to plan ahead for lunches for the week since we've removed the easy back up options.
3. I have to postpone my ordering of 2013 Year in Review! Which I was working on tonight and just occurred to me! Bah!
4. These kinds of little spending desires are going to keep happening... they are not all bad but it's good to keep them in check.
5. We very much want this month to have a feeling of abundance around it, not scarcity. We have so much.
I plan to adjust but not eliminate things from our normal lives, and find a way to do the things we value, just without money. Kind of like a life puzzle. Keeps things interesting! Here goes day three...
At Solomon's Porch this week, the photographer who shot the amazing photos of Doug and Shelley's 25th anniversary party (pw: 25th) also covered a huge table with free books.
How they lived in countries with little/no income plus apparent student loans was not clear, because we are just reaching a point where we could consider a new adventure outside of working to pay off our debt, so the level I related to the book was a mini version of their experiences. For example: they lived and communed with people in a rural part of Nicaragua for a year, and we spent two weeks exploring the islands. We spent three days reconnecting with my host family in a tiny fishing village in Thailand this year and they lived in China for more than three years.
Yet even with these tiny glimpses of perspective we call our own, I related to so much of their struggles with staleness and routine back here. Simplicity seems impossible. Community is less engrained here. Individualism and productivity rule. We make money instead of time. To voice disinterest or concern with valuing these things even among Christian circles is sometimes met with annoying resistance or defense of the status quo. It's heartening to read stories from other passionate people that ground me - we're not crazy and in fact there's room in the future to be much more radical than we are now. As Joke once said, "I think it's funny when people think I'm too liberal. I think I'm not radical enough" (paraphrased from my memory).
The couple spent time creating patterns outside of the norms and here it all seems like too much and not enough. Too much money changing hands, not enough time to sit still in a day. Too much time being paid to sit in front of a computer idly, not enough time to move and explore, participate fully.
Their conclusions mostly center around community and gratefulness, which are great reminders. I think I always knew that, but reading stories of others fighting to find community, peace, and gratefulness amidst the busy times of American life was helpful. They point out that these things are harder here and I feel more encouraged to rise up to the challenge. Inspired living will be easier in different places and phases of life that are more spirited. And those places and times will come along with a set of different challenges that we will face then.
Does anyone want to be the next inheritor of this book? Let me know.
I looked over the table and one of the titles struck me: This Ordinary Adventure: Settling Down without Settling. The title itself is almost identical to goal #3!
3. Consider the balance and the difference between settling vs. contentment
Part of the reasons I'm writing about this (busy yet repetitive) time of life is that I think about it a lot and I suspect others are struggling with similar things. I'd like to tell the authors of this book how much I appreciate them sharing their transition into ordinary experiences in a book that found itself to me. I was worried that it would be cheesy but it is a very relatable back and forth account by a young couple who share their experiences of the transition from living directly meaningful lives abroad to living and working 'normal' jobs in the Midwest.
3. Consider the balance and the difference between settling vs. contentment
Part of the reasons I'm writing about this (busy yet repetitive) time of life is that I think about it a lot and I suspect others are struggling with similar things. I'd like to tell the authors of this book how much I appreciate them sharing their transition into ordinary experiences in a book that found itself to me. I was worried that it would be cheesy but it is a very relatable back and forth account by a young couple who share their experiences of the transition from living directly meaningful lives abroad to living and working 'normal' jobs in the Midwest.
How they lived in countries with little/no income plus apparent student loans was not clear, because we are just reaching a point where we could consider a new adventure outside of working to pay off our debt, so the level I related to the book was a mini version of their experiences. For example: they lived and communed with people in a rural part of Nicaragua for a year, and we spent two weeks exploring the islands. We spent three days reconnecting with my host family in a tiny fishing village in Thailand this year and they lived in China for more than three years.
Yet even with these tiny glimpses of perspective we call our own, I related to so much of their struggles with staleness and routine back here. Simplicity seems impossible. Community is less engrained here. Individualism and productivity rule. We make money instead of time. To voice disinterest or concern with valuing these things even among Christian circles is sometimes met with annoying resistance or defense of the status quo. It's heartening to read stories from other passionate people that ground me - we're not crazy and in fact there's room in the future to be much more radical than we are now. As Joke once said, "I think it's funny when people think I'm too liberal. I think I'm not radical enough" (paraphrased from my memory).
The couple spent time creating patterns outside of the norms and here it all seems like too much and not enough. Too much money changing hands, not enough time to sit still in a day. Too much time being paid to sit in front of a computer idly, not enough time to move and explore, participate fully.
Their conclusions mostly center around community and gratefulness, which are great reminders. I think I always knew that, but reading stories of others fighting to find community, peace, and gratefulness amidst the busy times of American life was helpful. They point out that these things are harder here and I feel more encouraged to rise up to the challenge. Inspired living will be easier in different places and phases of life that are more spirited. And those places and times will come along with a set of different challenges that we will face then.
Does anyone want to be the next inheritor of this book? Let me know.
I felt a little gift over the fourth of July weekend (one little extra blessing among many if I really think about it).
In my initial reflection about slowing down, I said I wanted to find a beach and take a swim and see the Northern Lights from my childhood.
We were invited up to Dave and Danielle's family's cabin for the 4th and had some great adventures, but incredibly, the first night we arrived we went for a swim and there was the faintest glimpse of the Northern Lights in the night sky. It was faintly similar to the memory I have of when I was about fifteen and up in Northern Ontario with my family - I went for a swim one night when they were blazing green over top of me - it was calm and beautiful. The world slowed down.
The Huffington Post has a recent article about slowing down time perception, and talks about the reasons behind what we all feel - as a kid you think time takes forever, and as an adult you feel like it can't slow down.
"The more detailed the memory, the longer the moment seems to last." The remedy is a combination of mindfulness and introducing yourself to new experiences, both of which I think are valuable. Mindfulness, thankfulness, new inputs.
In my initial reflection about slowing down, I said I wanted to find a beach and take a swim and see the Northern Lights from my childhood.
(from google images search - i tried to find one like my childhood experience)
The Huffington Post has a recent article about slowing down time perception, and talks about the reasons behind what we all feel - as a kid you think time takes forever, and as an adult you feel like it can't slow down.
"The more detailed the memory, the longer the moment seems to last." The remedy is a combination of mindfulness and introducing yourself to new experiences, both of which I think are valuable. Mindfulness, thankfulness, new inputs.






